While lots of married couples absolutely adore their in-laws, this isn't always the case. In many marriages, at least one spouse is lukewarm to his or her in-laws, and may even openly dislike them. Issues between a married couple and their in-laws can add tension to the relationship and make get-togethers around the holidays difficult. This can be a useful time to find a marriage counselor in your area and schedule an appointment with your spouse. You'll find that this article gives you a chance to hopefully improve the situation, making life easier for both of you. Here are some areas on which you can concentrate.
Expressing Truth Safely
A marriage counselor gives you and your spouse a venue for expressing the truths that you have about each other's parents in a safe environment. Often, you and your spouse may argue about your respective in-laws. For example, you might say something derogatory about your mother-in-law, and your spouse may retort by making a nasty comment about their father-in-law. This scenario can devolve into a full-on dispute in which both of you make comments that you might later regret. Your marriage counselor will talk to you about how to share your truth without making your statements hurtful.
Exploration Of Coping Strategies
Often, a difficult dynamic with your in-laws can be made easier if you develop a coping strategy that is effective. You may be at your wit's end with how to deal with this situation, and your "coping strategies" may be to withdraw at family engagements or make hurtful comments under your breath. A marriage counseling session gives you the opportunity to explore productive ways to deal with the situation. For example, you and your spouse might decide to keep the number of annual family get-togethers to a certain number.
Taking Care Of Your Needs
It can sometimes feel difficult to take care of your own needs when you're in this type of difficult situation. For example, you might feel as though you're better off staying away from an overbearing in-law, but not want to appear rude by avoiding a gathering. Your marriage counselor can help you to discover what you need out of this situation, as well as what your partner needs. You can then come to a proper agreement on how you can each honor your own needs while supporting one another. Problematic in-laws can be a common subject that many couples face, so your counselor will be adequately prepared to help you.
For more information, contact a company like The Center for Family Counseling, Inc.